Fostering Tea Session (Kai Mei)

 


Sharing by Kai Mei at the joint intro tea session with Epworth Community Services on 31 July 2021.

Kai Mei has four children of her own and came to know about fostering through FamChamps, which is organised by Focus on the Family Singapore. During one of the sessions, she heard a foster mother and her son shared about fostering. At that point of time, the concept of fostering was foreign yet something happened in her heart. Her family started to explore if this was something that God wanted them to do. It didn’t stop at that talk. One of her friends was a foster mother and linked her up to attend this same tea session organised by Epworth some time ago. After that tea session, God laid upon their hearts to seriously consider fostering.

How Jeannie (not her real name) came to join her family was truly by God's grace! When Epworth called Kai Mei for the first time to take in Jeannie, their family was worried as they mentioned she would cry for a few hours. However, they decided to take her in for respite care after the second phone call. It turned out that Jeannie fit so well with the family! Despite the description earlier, God has arranged it by His grace to bring this child into the right family and that was Kai Mei’s!


Kai Mei shared the importance of community to support a foster child. From her immediate family to her neighbours, they mobilised support to provide a warm and nurturing environment for Jeannie. She encouraged everyone not to go solo and to tap on support from people around them.
Fostering brought its own challenges. She experienced family strife in areas such as differences among her family on how to correct the foster child. It was so important to communicate honestly and for every member to sing the same song. Her family would sit down together to discuss how best to help Jeannie learn. Sometimes, one member will be identified as the best person to correct while another will support Jeannie after that.
Her advice to new foster parents: - While it was important to reach out and meet the needs of the vulnerable child, it was also important to take care of ourselves and not to let the world revolve around the foster child. We should not see a child as so "poor thing" but to think long-term on how we can empower them as individuals.

Popular posts from this blog

Robin and Linda's Extraordinary Ordinary Lives

  Robin and Linda together with their own children and grandchildren   (FIRST PUBLISHED IN THE SOLID ROCK MAGAZINE, 2008) Of Such Is The Kingdom Of Heaven     It’s August 2008. Robin and Linda Lim, aged 56 and 52 respectively, share their five-room HDB flat with their three natural children and four foster children*: Terence (aged nine), Joshua (26 months old), Moses (20 months old) and Rebecca (15 months old). And there’s Oscar — a Siberian husky who started out as a temporary boarder and somehow ended up becoming part of the family as well. Take a peep into their extraordinarily ordinary lives.    Love Means Choosing To Sacrifice     Over the past five years, nine “special needs” children, ranging from newborns to teenagers, have been a part of the Lims’ family for between four months and five years. And though packed with four cots (one in the living room) and a double-decker bed, the Lims’ home is surprisingly uncluttered. Some of these children, Linda shared, have experienced negl
Read more

"A Cheerful Giver" (Michael & Irene)

3 foster children from HFG families received awards from MSF last weekend. Michael and Irene just shared with us what Nicole* (not her real name) did after the ceremony! Our hearts are so warm...Nicole, we are cheering you on! SHARING BY MICHAEL “So let each one give as he purposes in his heart, not grudgingly or of necessity; for God loves a cheerful giver.” - 2 Corinthians 9:7 NKJV Today I (Michael) really saw what this verse truly meant. Nicole* received the MSF Academic Achievement Award. Along with it she was awarded a prize voucher. During our journey back from church, Nicole was quietly discussing something with her younger foster sister. Nicole than came excitedly to me saying; "Daddy, Daddy, you can use part of the money and go enjoy a meal with Mummy!" I looked at Nicole surprised: "Why?". Nicole replied with glee; "I want to treat you & Mummy to your your favourite chilli dish." (She knew I like spicy food.) I decided to pull her leg ,"
Read more

MSF Award Ceremony for Foster Children and Youth 2022 (Audrie)

It’s MSF Award Ceremony for Foster Children and Youth 2022! We are so happy to see that 3 HFG foster children got the MSF academic excellence awards from Minister for Social and Family Development, Mr Masagos Zulkifli! Today, we want to celebrate these children and wanted to find out their dreams! We were onsite and managed to collect some short snippets. MICHAEL, IRENE and NICOLE* (14 year-old foster girl). Nicole, got an award for her Sec 2 results. Michael and Irene shared that they felt so happy for Nicole because they saw her putting in a lot of effort. With the transition from primary school to Secondary school, Nicole had to juggle between her CCA, her studies, moving between the homes of her natural family and foster family. She rose above it all to focus and do well in her studies. Nicole was happy that she got an award as she didn’t expect to get it. She shared that her dream was to be a teacher when she grows up, one who is patient and will put in a lot of effort to help the
Read more

Fostering Tea Session April 2023 (Alan & Eliz) - Caring for a Foster Child with Neurodiversity

  One Day At A Time – Eliz and Alan’s Journey of caring for a foster child with neurodiversity   How It Started Eliz and Alan’s fostering journey started when Alan asked Eliz if she was keen to attend a fostering introduction session and she agreed without hesitating. Before they took the leap of faith, they were considering how their lifestyle would be changed with a foster child in the house. They had a carefree lifestyle and were able to have vacations during off-peak season. They were also concerned about whether they could manage the caregiving of their aged parents if they were also caring for a foster child.  The couple did not have their own children, and Eliz felt that the marriage was incomplete without a child. Eliz waited for 16 years for God to answer her prayer and He called her to be a foster mother.  Doubts to Reassurance  After they were approved as foster parents, they received a call from MSF about caring for a premature baby, Eugene*. Eliz was quite hesitant about c
Read more

Launch of Befrienders for Families with co-developer The Salvation Army

Being foster parents and journeying with fellow foster parents in the past 10 years, we are very thankful for UBS Optimus Foundation’s support in this new program - Befrienders for Families (BFF) - co-developed by both HFG-SG and The Salvation Army Singapore (TSA)! Supporting the natural families of the foster children is also important in the entire care continuum. Last Friday, the BFF program was officially launched at TSA’s Red Shield Appeal Event 2023. Here’s a few photos taken at the event. We were too busy meeting new and old friends, and eating, so here’s only 3 photos!
Read more